Jem - Keep on Wolking

Keep on Walking Lyrics

The world's got so dark I need
some guidance to see
'cause this pain in my heart is
taking everything from me.

It is true that love makes the
world go round
Please give some love to me
'cause I'm feeling so alone
right now, it's suffocating me.

God give me strength
to keep on walking
God give me strength
to keep on, keep on
God give me strength
to keep on walking
God give me strength
to keep on, keep on

The air's got so thick I find
it hard to breathe
And before have
I felt so desperately in need

I know that I must start listening
to the voice inside of me.
The truth is that when I speak to
you, I hope to speak to me.

God give me strength,
to keep on walking
God give me strength,
to keep on, keep on
God give me strength,
to keep on walking
God give me strength,
to keep on, keep on

Oooh, oooh, my darling
God is you
God is you

God give me strength,
to keep on walking
God give me strength,
to keep on, keep on

God give me strength,
to keep on walking
God give me strength,
to keep on, keep on

God give me strength,
to keep on walking
[God, keep on, keep on giving
me strength]
God give me strength
to keep on, keep on.

God, keep on, keep on giving
me strength.
(repeat)

Nail Scarred Hands

"What is real?" the velveteen rabbit asked the skin horse. The skin horse replied, "Real isn't how you are made, it's a thing that happens to you . When a child loves you a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the rabbit.

"Sometime," said the skin horse, "but when you are real you don't mind being hurt. It doesn't happen all at once, it takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real, you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

I've been thinking alot about the trials, we as believers especially, go through in the refining period. I found this little exert from the Velveteen Rabbit to be profound in many ways. The idea that the Lord is working in us to make us real. This goes along with the quote on my facebook profile. "Now with God's help I shall become myself." And it's true, transformation does not happen right away even though we wish the Lord would hurry up sometimes. And yet even Christ had to grow up and be put through the grind of life before He could go to the cross in His final act of submission that cost Him dearly. And yet His heart was that through His blood we also could successfully walk through the "sanctifying" process of life. These last years I have been walking this path of obedience with the Lord because I believed He had called me to Thailand, and always Thailand was the goal. So when I arrived and felt like finally I was in the promised land life would lighten up a bit and the blessing would now pour down and yet I'm realizing there is as much uncertainty in my future in the land the Lord has brought me to as there was getting here. As I look soberly at the future I realize I am a very young girl who has set out on a rather large adventure. The horizon before me is endless and I feel very small. I am here yes, but now I wonder "to do what exactly?" I am thankful that at least for my first 6-9 months I don't need to know what's next just learn Thai, however trusting the Lord to lead me now that I'm here has become no easier that trusting Him to bring me here. I feel instead that what I learned in the valley is now being put into practice in the wilderness. I feel the sting this time of what I have left behind and even at times felt much like the Israelite s coming out of Egypt looking back and saying...we had it good in Egypt...and yet I know that my time at home was difficult. Why is it that the fear of the unknown makes us unable to trust the Lord and fall back in to complacency of what we know even if we don't like it. TRUST......I was just reading the book "Power of Desperation" by Michael Catt and one of the things he wrote made me realize how little I think of my Father's love and ability to take care of me. He gives the illustration that God is the potter and we are the clay and the times that He has to break us down are painful yes but we never have to fear because the hands and feet that push the wheel and shape the clay are nail scarred. How could we ever doubt the intentions of such a God to have the very best for us?

Labyrinth

I have to laugh softly to myself as I read over my old blogs. The verse "Nothing new under the sun" seems to sum up my life. I seem always to be on a journey somewhere and yet time and again I am faced with similar roadblocks, money, paperwork, uncertainty. I always seem to be somewhere in between goodbye and hello. And yet I never really leave and I never fully arrive. I am in this constant state of waiting. I always seem to be back in my home living off the mercy of my parents and yet the clock keeps ticking and I am a year, 2 years older. I guess the question in my mind is "When will my life begin...I mean really begin not just turn in circles." I feel like I have been walking through a maze only to come up against the same walls time and time again. They are veiled so as to look a little different and yet they are not. Is there a lesson I am supposed to be learning that I am not mastering. The movie Labyrinth was a favorite of mine when I was younger, I watched it over and over. There is a surreal quality to the film that seems to infuse my life as well. Like a dream where all the pieces are legitimate and yet come together in the most bizarre sequence. I have to wonder as I work towards leaving for Thailand again in the near future, will I be back here where I started within the year? When will I get off this circular railroad. Always stopping at the same stations, over and over again. Hmm...just some thoughts ......

I am learning the nature of the story we are all in. Lord of the Rings is one of my favorite movies of all times. The epic nature of the long struggle towards a goal. The seemingly endless roadblocks and disappoinments. The loss of loved ones, partners in the struggle. The bitter path against an unseen powerful enemy that will do anything to thwart the thread we walk in the grander scheme of the tapestry of life. The times of respite that are sweet but so often fleeting. The doubt that creeps in to knaw at the mind...would't it be easier to give up, walk an easier thread...does this journey really mean anything? And yet...the pull is at these times so strong. The calling out of greater purpose; of a pilgrimage only you can make...only you were made for. Yet through it all hope shines brightly like and even' star. Hope banishes the darkness, the doubts. At times we are joined in our journey by others walking the same path and then our paths diverge so we are once again walking it alone. Sometimes it is by chance and others by choice. Sometimes it is to hard to expect others to walk the path we walk... it is not their task to undertake. At first the pace seems easy, the path straight forward with only slight bumps to interfere and yet as you continue to walk the valleys get deeper, the shadows longer with fewer beams of sunlight to light the path. Fewer streams to rest beside. But something in us drives us on, moves us forward. In this epic story we are all called to play a part. I have been learning this last while what my part in the story is and with anticipation look forward to the unfolding of that purpose. It would seem that my pupose right now is to be daughter, sister, aunt, and friend.

Fragile

The razor sharp line between disillusionment and expectation. Holding power to bring life or crushing blows. It opens the doors to the hearts fondest dreams or the blackest void where emptiness and bitterness crouch waiting to spring a surpise attack. Fragile as a bubble caught on the wind, tenacious as a weed in the desert. The feelings it invokes resemble a symphony with all it’s highs to crashing lows or lilting notes or driving beats. And yet disappointed walks alongside like a drowner sucking in for air and yet filled instead with panic of certain death.. Such is the power and path weaved by hope.

by:Michael Jordan Spencer

While I'm Waiting

John Waller

The Blessing
I’m waiting

I’m waiting on You, Lord

And I am hopeful

I’m waiting on You, Lord

Though it is painful

But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident

Taking every step in obedience

While I’m waitingI will serve You

While I’m waitingI will worship

While I’m waitingI will not faint

I’ll be running the race

Even while I wait

I’m waitingI’m waiting on You, Lord

And I am peaceful

I’m waiting on You, Lord

Though it’s not easy, no

But faithfully, I will waitYes, I will wait

And I will move ahead, bold and confident

Taking every step in obedience

While I’m waitingI will serve You

While I’m waitingI will worship

While I’m waitingI will not faint

I’ll be running the race

Even while I wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident

I'll be taking every step in obedience, yea
While I’m waitingI will serve You

While I’m waitingI will worship

While I’m waitingI will not faint
I will serve You while I’m waiting

I will worship while I’m waiting

I will serve You while I’m waiting

I will worship while I’m waiting

I will serve You while I’m waiting

I will worship while I’m waiting

I will serve You while I’m waiting

I will worship while I’m waiting on You, Lord